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Who’s My Daddy?

June 15, 2009

With all the buzz about the ‘Cougar’ phenomenon, I have been concerned.  The less I hear about the May/December pairings, the more I worry that this time-honored male fantasy has gone the way of the dodo bird.

Just when I thought all hope was lost, the clouds literally parted as a dodo emerged. My inbox welcomed a digital overture from a 60 year old man ready to start making some babies. Sweet.
(They don’t call them ‘sextegenerians’ for nothing.)

I was excited to receive his many emails.  Only one thing about his profile gave me pause…  Given the already gaping age gap his life experience advantage, the main picture choice is curious.  He’s decked out in a Revolutionary War period costume.
(He might as well have gone for Paleolithic.)

Here’s an excerpt from the message I received:

Blue-Tooth-George-Washington--38190Are you at all intrigued with our possibilities, even if only for interesting conversations? I enjoy meeting and getting to know people. As with all things in life, one never knows what might become of such interactions. I realistically view meeting others as doors opening into the future, to be enjoyed and explored without any preconceived notions of where they will go or become.

As flattering as the attention is, let’s keep it real.  How many men have you known to approach a woman on a dating site for ‘interesting conversations’? 
(My point exactly.

So, how does one respond to such an email?
(In poetic verse… naturally.)

0641725612My Dad is cool.
He’s 61 and super great.
Given that you’re close to his age,
I’d prefer not to date.
Still, good luck to you, Sir.
Be patient while you wait.
Hope you find a fertile lady
With whom to procreate.

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