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Beach Bummer

February 17, 2009

From: BeachMan

To: Me

Subject: Dear 25% Jew

I did laugh. You know yourself. Care to write some for me? Tell me where you came from, and why marketing?

From: Me

To: BeachMan

Subject: Re: Dear 25% Jew

Glad to have provided entertainment. I try.

As for why marketing, [Personal information redacted].

So, Mr. Beachman – do you have a first name? I figure your parents must’ve given you one to put on all those diplomas. 😉

S

From: BeachMan

To: Me

Subject: Namesake

Ken is my name. What about you?

From: Me

To: BeachMan

Subject: Namesake

Sylvia. Nice to ‘meet’ you. 🙂

From: BeachMan

To: Me

Subject: RE: Re: Namesake

You too.

{Match.com form letter}

From: BeachMan

To: Me

Thanks for writing to me, but unfortunately, we’re just not a good match. Good luck in your search!

Our profiles didn’t match on:

• Values

Don’t get discouraged!

With millions of singles on Match.com, you’re bound to find a few that aren’t right for you. Don’t let that stop you; instead, search for and contact other members who are waiting to meet you!

From: Me

To: BeachMan

Subject Re: Match.com Message: Thanks, but…

Ken,

Dude, buddy, pal… you wrote to me. (I heard y’all didn’t read our profiles, but I guess it’s true. 😉

Best ‘o luck,

Sylvia

From: BeachMan

To: Me

Subject: RE: Re: Thanks, but…

True, might of been the slip of hand.

*UNSENT*

From: Me

To: BeachMan

Subject: RE: Re: Thanks, but…

It’s all good. Keyboards can be quite slippery… I guess. (Is one of your Master’s, by chance, in Bation?)

S

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